A Letter to My College Self
Hello, Dear Friends,
Back in 2015, as I navigated high school, discerning which college to attend was a huge milestone to finally hit! By my freshman/sophomore year in high school, I was 110% sold on attending Oklahoma State University and my aspirations were set for the sky. I would gain my bachelor’s degree in Agricultural Leadership, which is a very diverse degree program studying animal science, plant and soil science, entomology, food science, and leadership theory.
I wanted to hit the ground running and be as involved as possible on campus and in the College of Agriculture. During that first fall semester, my intention was for my degree to emphasize extension education, so that I could become an Extension Agent and give back to the Texas 4-H Program which largely contributed to my personal/professional development.
From an early age, I have had an extreme desire to achieve and do well, but I have begun to realize that my eyes have been closed far too often. I have walled myself off from encountering the present moment, far too frequently...to enjoy (with peace) the place that I am today with the people who surround me.
I had exceptional mentorship from talented professors at OSU and the best wisdom they imparted to me was to “stay open-minded.”
I had a disproportional idea that in order to stamp my ticket for getting the most impressive and prestigious job post-graduation I needed to check these boxes to get myself to my ultimate destination = DREAM JOB. While my time in college certainly helped lead me to a great job in Human Resources at a wonderful company - I am reminded of the saying, “Hindsight is always 20/20.” There are many other important facets of going to school, maturing, and growing up.
So here it goes - A Letter to My College Self
Dear Lady K,
You have lived and you have learned. You lead a beautiful life. As you navigate college, I want to present you with these words of wisdom to help you discern what truly matters.
The most crucial thing you can do in any environment is to FIND and RELY on your identity as a Daughter of Christ. You are away from home and making your own decisions (without parental guidance) on pursuing the Church and cultivating your relationship with your Heavenly Father.
On this note - there is not a career or job on this earth that will satisfy your every need. Take it to prayer. Where is Jesus leading you? Where is He calling you to serve others with your unique talents and gifts?
Feeling disappointed? That once-in-a-lifetime internship opportunity fell through, you weren’t selected for a seat on the student council, you aren’t in a sorority and it feels weird not to be in one, you got a C on that dreaded chemistry exam. You are okay. Take a deep breath. Your worth is not determined by your productivity and how many achievements you can list on your resume.
When it comes to your vocation - what are your desires? What are Christ’s desires for you? Marriage? Becoming a mom? Do your career aspirations help you or limit you if you have a strong desire for family life?
I get it. It hurts. The first friend you met on campus is no longer the sister for life you imagined. It’s hard to understand, but some people are only placed in your life for a season. There is not room in your inner circle for everyone. Rely on the true, sincere friendships and make them the priority in your life.
Are you agonizing over switching your major or degree plan? It is okay if your lifelong aspiration of becoming a nurse, veterinarian, teacher, marketing professional, or any other career has changed. While it may feel like it now, it is not the end of the world. Take this time to figure out what you DO NOT want to do and you will be that much closer to discovering what fulfills you.
The cute guy you met on Saturday night has never texted you back? You are beautiful! Do not let feelings of unworthiness creep into your heart. It is not because you don’t have the right wardrobe, makeup, or personality. I know how easy it is to feel like the one weirdo while everyone else sleeps around, lives for a night of drinking, and a one-night stand. I get it, those other girls are sharing photos of their boyfriends in every photo on their feed. A boy will not fulfill any void in your heart. Do not compromise to the will of the world. I promise, that when you keep your standards high and seek the man who will make you the best version of yourself - you will be so proud of staying true to yourself and your virtue. It’s okay to be innocent and proud of it.
P.S. You have the most wonderful and supportive husband today whose sole goal is to love you well and help you get to heaven. You made an excellent choice in the man you married and life with him at your side just gets better and better. Good job, Katherine - he’s seriously the best!
Are you beating yourself up for falling into the same vices and sins? Begin again. Take it to the cross or find a time to go to confession. This is a great resource for examining your heart to prepare for confession. https://bit.ly/47NiVEJ
Are you sinking into a hole of having no idea what to do with your degree or what jobs to seek when you graduate? If you have the time and willingness - explore part-time jobs that will work with your schedule.
Retail of any kind teaches how to build up your customer service skills.
Food service jobs teach you how to handle multiple tasks at once to ensure that the customer is satisfied. Coffee shop barista? Work at a Tea and Energy shop?
Do you have a desire to cultivate your passion for writing? Can you be a freelance writer for a magazine, blog, or local business?
Student Teaching - a great way to get paid by the university for grading papers or monitoring online discussions and it follows the university calendar.
Interested in Research? Find your favorite professor and see if they have undergraduate research opportunities you can get involved with.
Love floral design? Can you take a floral design class as an elective? Or work at a local flower shop to gain experience?
Stop obsessing about your grades. Yes, you have an obligation to do well in school, but school is not everything. Grab your pals and go play pickleball, go on a coffee date, or catch that concert on a Friday night. Once you graduate college, you will likely never be with the same group of people all in one place ever again. Have fun - your time is flexible - take advantage of that!
It seems surprising and it can be challenging to loosen the reins - but you don’t have to have every detail of your life planned out now. It will all come together in good timing. Some prayers take a while before they are answered. And sometimes we close our eyes and limit ourselves from seeing how our prayers were answered.
Graduation Pictures 2020
You’ve got this! Whatever comes your way - rely on your tribe of people who care for you and know you better than yourself.
Your time at college can be fun and wonderful, but there’s so much joy in your life to come - keep your eyes and heart open to it!
All the Best,
Lady K from 2023
Lady K’s One Thing:
A recent book read that I absolutely loved and was recommended by a great friend! The Midwife of Auschwitz by Anna Stuart. Pack your tissues - it is a very sobering read and based on a true story.
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